on her twenty-second birthday, she already is an old maid

what did i learn from filling out my exit survey from NWC?
well, that i wasn't involved in anything. i contributed nothing of worth.
i guess i could use the fact that i'm a music major to make me feel better about it. but honestly, i wasn't really the person they ran to when they needed people to do stuff. heck, my name wasn't included or even spelled right half the time.
why am i complaining? it is so much easier to leave when it seems like you weren't even there to begin with. life moves on.
i'm learning to be alone. i'm learning to like being alone. i'm pushing people away and ruining my last weeks on campus. why? because i'm going to be utterly alone. no friends, no people close in age, no family near, nothing. absolutely nothing. unless i don't get a job and live at home for the rest of my life.... so tempting. why should i be happy? why should i be excited to move on?